Stoned from cradle to grave

BIG BAR

I was truly humbled when I read the letter from Dr. Malee about the medical uses of marijuana. I had no idea it was a panacea for such a long list of diseases and maladies, perhaps exceeding the efficacy of that popular medicine of earlier generations, snake oil.

It made me sad to think of the harsh opinions expressed about the seemingly healthy young men tearing up and down the county road in Big Bar in their expensive trucks and ATVs without a care (or job) in the world other than tending their gardens and hot houses, when it is now revealed that they are simply sick and self-medicating. Of course I thought they were sick before I read the letter, but that's another connotation of the word.

Reading down the good doctor's list of medical problems eased by pot, it occurred to me that most women could begin enjoying this elixir in their tweens, from cramps to PMS to childbirth to menopause. But what about those first 11 or 12 years?

Surely scientific research and controlled testing would show earlier beneficial uses, and I suggest a close look at cradle cap, infant colic, teething, terribletwo's tantrums, kindergarten separation anxiety, and the usual childhood diseases encountered in grammar school.

Adding these maladies to the list would also help the males of the species, who seem to fall through the cracks in several age groups. Again, a rigorous search should be conducted to fill in the gaps; I propose a careful look at teenage acne, hat hair, mid-life crises, and enlarged prostates. Thus covered, both Trinity men and Trinity women could toke their way along life's path, blissfully stoned from cradle to grave.